I remember an extra hard day when I was a teenager when I discovered just how strong my mother was.
Life at home growing up always seemed to be a struggle. Money was scarce, tension was high, and my self-confidence seemed always on a collision course with hidden icebergs.
Yet through it all mom seemed to hold the peace, keep a smile on her face, and shower our home with love. She had a beautiful singing voice and enjoyed softly singing while taking care of the house.
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are gray
You’ll never know dear, how much I love you
Please don’t take my sunshine away
Her beautiful voice resonating through our home softly filled the emptiness I often felt with a simple feeling of love. She gave me hope when I didn’t know what hope was.
I have been feeling her voice again, and her accompanying gift of hope, as I quietly celebrated what would have been her 73rd birthday on Saturday.
When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother, what will I be
Will I be pretty
Will I be rich
Here’s what she said to me
Que será, será
Whatever will be, will be
The future’s not ours to see
Que será, será
What will be, will be
Mom’s name was Carolyn Shirley Christiansen Patterson. She was the oldest of seven children, 5 girls and two boys, and was raised in Monroe, Utah, just a scant five miles south of Richfield where she would raise her six children.
Mom was just 59 when she finished her journey 13 years ago this past May, just before Mother’s Day.
Now I’m no longer alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own
It was on that extra hard day as a teen when I discovered just how strong my mother was. It was then I started to realized what it meant to be a perfectly imperfect mom.
The day was extra tough though I don’t remember why though I’m guessing it was because dad and I had a fight of some kind. Before I could storm out of the house (this part I remember starkly clear), mom came to hug me as I stood at the back door.
Her hug felt more like a desperate hold, clinging almost as if she feared she was losing me. Mom cried like I had never felt another person cry, pleading through her wailing tears for me not to go.
Somewhere in the process, our roles seem to transpose, I becoming the one offering comforting strength and mom the one in need of assurance all would be alright even though everything said otherwise.
That’s when I began to really discover just how perfectly imperfect mom was. By shear faith she triumphed daily over a debilitating physical handicap. Through her pure goodness she held us together. Because of her never-ending love she forgave over and over.
Though mom and dad’s marriage ended a long decade later, her love for dad through the their many trials of life taught me what it meant to truly love and always forgive one who you love.
I leave you with a few words, weaved together in lyrical rhyme, in gratitude for my wonderful sunshine mother.
A MOTHER’S MIRACLE
By Les Patterson
A miracle I am looking for
Something to bring me peace
Answers to complex questions
Desperately I plead and seek.
In my quest for resolution
Hope and understanding
Answers came as did peace
In gentle ways not expecting.
Comfort and inspiration
Flooded my aching soul
A mother’s love providing
That which does console.
No heavenly love, I thought
Could ever be felt greater
Excepting that of the Father
Whose full love will come later.
Such a gift I long to receive
To be wrapped in His embrace
Till then I find what I need
The love in my mother’s face.
Have a wonderful day! Thanks for letting me share!
p.s. Take 13 minutes today to choose to see the sunshine in those whose perfectly imperfect love blessed you so much.
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